Saturday, July 23, 2005

Mr. Mandible the Motivational Speaker

I live in a van down by the river.... No one could forget the motivational speaker created by Chris Farley, but this blog is about a guy who, unfortunately, actually gets paid for speaking. His name wasn't Mandible, but that's what I always referred to him as because well he was a character. He was brought to my school one year on one of those wondrous Staff Development days. We were treated to his deranged looks and wild gesticulations for well over an hour. He looked just like one of the long lost Mario Brothers, yes from the video games sans painter cap. He bounced around and spoke at a hundred miles a clip, or hundred words a second, and would pause at times asking some one--Hey You, what's your name?

Uh George

George, hey Can I call you George, I feel that I can call you George, and then proceed to use George in a wild scenario.

He pointed at a woman and yelled, I don't see a woman, I don't see a man, I see a person!!!

Or pause at a black teacher and wag a finger at her and said, I don't see you as a black person, I don't see you as a white person, I see you as you, what's your name Hon?

He went on to belch out pearls of wisdom from his life, like when his son spoke with fouls language, he made him lay down in the gutter, and smiled proudly and said, I told him if you want to have a gutter mouth now you are going to lay in the gutter. He hasn't cursed since!!!

He also said words I live by,
Blue Monday
Terrible Tuesday
Wednesday Humpday
Thursday sucks
Thank god it's Friday...And if any of you feel that way, you have no right doing the job you are doing, get out and do something different.

His goal, I thing was to motivate us to feel good about our jobs, I know he lifted a lot of our spirits but only because of what a colossal load he was. It is a good thing I cannot recall his real name, I would have used it here. And then perish the thought might I be fired for blogging????

peace
c

Comments:
oh my God is this creep typical of staff development speakers - Maurice remembers one dud many years ago who walked around screaming at us like we were in elementary school, especially if we didn't raise our hand, answer questions, or appeared bored. After a while, me and 3 other Social Studies teachers just walked out of the room, while he was screaming at us to remain. The last guy out of the room gave him the finger.
 
>>His goal, I thing was to motivate us to feel good about our jobs, I know he lifted a lot of our spirits but only because of what a colossal load he was. It is a good thing I cannot recall his real name, I would have used it here. And then perish the thought might I be fired for blogging????>>

Maurice recently read about a NYC firefighter who was fired for having a blog that contained criticisms of the Commissioner. With the voile and repugnant Chancellor we have, I wouldn't put anything past him too.
 
Thank you Maurice for posting, greengirl doesnt love me anymore :o(
 
Some people work over the summer. ooooooooooooooooooooooo Greengirl sat next to you during this atrocity and did not need to relive it. HEEEEEEE HEEEEEE
 
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