Monday, December 31, 2007
2007 My Year In Review
My birthday back in Jan this year was in the high 60's. a welcome departure to the usual blizzard or torrential cold. Saw Rocky Balboa and dined with a group of friends, got some cool gifts and had a nice time.
Landed in a new school in Feb, fell into the friend Zone with the woman I was dating at the time. She was a bit young and immature so I forgive her for her transgression. LOL JK Decided not to be friends with her and went on - referred to her in a previous blog about listening to a song and it becoming seemingly ubiquitous only because it is fresh in your mind. HA now you remember!!!!
Around the summer I had a near fatal attraction. Wont mention her name now or ever but it rhymed with a synonym for frightening. (sorry to make you think) Only close ones know!!! That was a mistake. I guess we are all entitled to our lil mistakes. Perhaps I will revisit this at a later date if anyone is really interested in hearing about it.
Eharmony. Curse? Pox? or just what the Dr. Ordered? Who the hell knows? in theory it seems like it has a lot more going for it than other dating sites, and at times seems like more of the same old on line dating flotsam and jetsam that permeate the cyber landscape with their pop up ads promising you the world and delivering only hefty credit card debt. Hey what can I say? I had a coupon.
Turkey day you read about.....
I had a really nice Christmas eve, spent at a dear friends home, with her family. They opened their house, and their lives to me and I thank them dearly for it.
I spent Christmas day with a new girlfriend. We had a nice time. I got a nice cashmere scarf. A few days later she broke up with me at a diner amidst the unpleasant conversation, the waiter, right out of the Sopranos was a welcome comic respite. I had liked her. I think she liked me too. That may have been the problem though I do not pretend to know what she was really thinking. It was a shame. But such is life. And I am glad she chose to "walk away" know as opposed to later down the line.
Now here a scant few minutes from the midnight hour I am sitting at home, alone. There is nothing wrong with that. By choice mostly. Well I had intended to spend it with someone but whatever. It has been a good year. I am officially divorced now for a year and 2 weeks. Even people I have not seen in years say they have never seemed happier. I guess the feeling I have that I am happier is not just a feeling but a permanent change in my aura and demeanor. Who knows.
I take another sip of my Bahama Mama and look at the clock. It is 11:55. I am gonna refreshen my drink and watch the ball drop. Which reminds me of a poem I wrote entitled "Where were you when the ball dropped?" I will post that tomorrow.
Until then be well and
HAPPY NEW YEAR ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thursday, December 27, 2007
On Writing and Wondering and Waiting for a Good Idea
Which is what I have been spending some time doing on my break this Holiday season. I am pulling up abandoned ideas and unfinished projects trying to find something to spark my imagination and to write again. There's an old saying that stories are never finished, only abandoned. I have abandoned many projects, finished about twice as many as that, and have infinite partial ideas with no feasible way to breathe life into them. Another saying is that writing is like giving birth. I know I am not barren because I do feel some kicking. :o)
Film critic Roger Ebert said something to the extent of, "so what if it has been done before, as long as its done well." I am inclined to follow that philosophy. The script I wrote for my MFA thesis had a pretty formulaic plot, but it worked. I tinkered with it and it fell apart. I should have stuck to my dramatic vision of the script and left it alone. It is now as it was intended, and decided, after much debate, to try to convert it into a novel. Hey I guess thats an idea right. Still have that dollar...any other ideas for me?
Friday, December 07, 2007
Gobble Gobble Gobble What Do I Say? Dining Alone on Thanksgiving Day
Well this is actually the 1st TD that I spend alone. Interestingly I tried to remember the last time I was alone for Thanksgiving and I couldn't. When my mother was in the Hospital that time for almost a full year some 2 decades ago I still had somewhere to go, as I did the year she could no longer hold onto this world....
Then after my divorce, friends close as family offered me their hospitality and I accepted. This year I rather foolishly thought that the same would happen, but it did not through some unforeseen circumstances. Either extended family gatherings were on the calendar or other things perhaps my company has grown tiresome to some. Aside from one person, no one called me to wish me a Happy Thanksgiving.
I know that communications work two ways, but I was feeling lone;ly and everyone knew I was as alone and could have called. I didn't want to disturb anyone who was basking in the of family warmth. I feared my voice would bring an inevitable chill and an empty offer or guilty offer to come by at the last minute, or a future offer for Christmas.
Nevertheless, on this Turkey Day I had a traditional meal along with many other foods; too many foods. I ventured out; putting on shoes in lieu of sneakers and got dressed up and went to the Hometown Buffet for a traditional Holiday meal.
The place was packed. I would say the place was fairly mixed with families anas well as elderly couples. I scanned most of the place and could not find anyone else who was dining alone.
I will admit I was surprised to see all the families of four or more people dining here but made no judgements about any of it. As I sat there stuffing my face with chicken, turkey and trimmings. I ate to the point just moments before feeling crapulent. I managed to push myself from the table (one of the most effective over indulgence exercises) and went back to my empty apartment. I checked my messages and there were none. I sat down on my couch and watched some TV on DVD; a favorite pastime of mine.
Hours later I felt I would be able to attack the pecan pie I had bought the day before in the hopes I would be able to bring it to a home that I was invited to. Have no fear, it did not go to waste. I did manage to make it last until Saturday evening.
So on this day like many others who have no one, I spent it doing things that I wanted to do and being thankful that I am free to enjoy those things....and perhaps the Hometown Buffet will serve me my repast on an impending Christmas solitude.
Postscript: I was graciously invited somewhere for Christmas and am inclined to accept their warm offer. I will let you know.